Friday, February 22, 2008

Nostalgia

My husband has been transferring some video from the little digital tapes to his computer and ultimately to dvd. We haven't been very diligent with the video camera; the most recent footage was from last October. However, he did uncover video from about six years ago, when our boys were 8, 6, 4, and 2.

Precious.

Absolutely precious.

I had forgotten.

I miss it.

I miss it terribly.

I finally had to quit watching because I felt so bittersweet and nostalgic and, quite frankly, sad. Those days went by so quickly. I should've known. I should've savored it. I should've enjoyed it.

In one portion of the video, the boys were playing in the sprinkler in the front yard. All four of them. Playing. Having fun. Together. Much giggling. Much silliness. Much, much fun.

Today, if they were to find an activity to do all together, which they do from time to time, like a game of two-on-two basketball in the driveway, someone invariably ends up mad or quitting or yelling or arguing or, yes, even crying. Every. Single. Time.

Life here at 14, 12, 10 and 8 years old is good, don't get me wrong. But it's different and in many respects more difficult. I miss the (seemingly) more carefree days when the boys were younger.

I am featured in some of the footage and I do not look as if I am enjoying it. In fact, I demanded my husband tell me that that is NOT what I really look like! (His reply? No comment! :-) )

If only I knew then what I know now. Would I laugh more? Would I smile more? Would I number my days, see that they are fleeting, and gain a heart of wisdom? Would I redeem the time?

I can't go back, no matter how much I would want to. But I can choose how I live today. I can choose joy. I can walk circumspectly, not as a fool, but wise, knowing that today is gift from the gracious hand of the Lord Almighty, to be lived for His glory.

And to you young mothers out there, this stage of life, though difficult, will indeed pass to the next stage and the next. You may have your doubts, but you will live through it. Enjoy it. Savor it.

And take lots of video.

You'll be glad you did.

9 comments:

  1. Thank you for reminding me of how precious these days are, I tend to forget so easily. Loved the post.

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  2. I needed to hear that. With 5 years' difference between our youngest boy and our little girl, I KNOW these days go fast, but it's still so hard day to day, even knowing I want to savor it. And it's easy to forget with the older ones, too, that these days are going too fast also.

    I'm glad you're back.

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  3. Lisa,
    I too loved this post! I was just asking the Lord this morning to help enjoy "these" days, especially the "teen or pre-teen" ones.
    I too look back and think the time has gone so fast. My kids are 16, 12, 11, 7, & 3, so I am in both seasons at once. I feel exhausted some days by the three year old and than wondering where did this sixteen year old come from.
    I have always wanted to enjoy my children at every stage. Thanks for such a beautiful reminder.

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  4. Oh, I SOO hear you. My 14-year-old looks taller when he comes home from school some days than when he left that morning!

    And in six years, we'll be thinking the same thing about the gripey teen days we're in right now.

    I've said it a bazillion times...
    The days and weeks creep, but the months and years fly.

    Enjoy Today.

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  5. Yes. MY sons are no 18,16,13, and 12. I look back at 10 and 12 and 8 and 6 and feel the same way. Time must move on, but we can learn to stop and savor better. I think, though, that no matter how much we savor, this feeling of bittesweet sorrow when we remember will always occur.

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  6. I was just thinking about this last night. I love the stages my children are at right now. But when I look back, I loved their younger days too.

    I came to the conclusion that each stage has its own unique joys and trials. Our "job" is to treasure the joys that we have today and let the trials slip out of our memory.

    Sounds like a God-sized goal to me.

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  7. I needed this today!

    I love them at this age...I never ever want to wish it away (even though I'm REALLY enjoying that they're still taking an extra long nap as I type!)...

    Thanks for this post.

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  8. Nice encouragement and advice Lisa! It's good to remember that God has ordained these days for us, this day for us. He will help us and His son that lives inside us is annointed with joy and we can live in His joy. Blessings on you and your tribe!

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  9. I loved this post. I really needed to hear it, and it made me get off the computer today and go play with my kids. Because I have a fifteen year old and two munchkins, I do know how fast these things go and I try to savor them, I do. But sometimes it's hard not to get stuck in life's muck.

    Thank you so much for the reminder of the blessings I am living right now.

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