Words worth pondering

"Mercy Prayer" from Paul David Tripp's A Shelter in the Time of Storm: Meditations on God and Trouble (p. 60-61):

I have no resume

to hold before You,

no track record of accomplishments,

no letters of commendation,

no rights of birth or ethnicity.

I hold nothing

that would place You in my debt,

nothing

that could curry Your favor,

nothing

that would obligate You.

I wish unbridled zeal

would commend me to You.

I wish unbroken obedience

would draw Your attention.

I wish model wisdom and model love

would convince You that I'm worthy.

But I have none of these things

to offer You

I stand before You with shoulders bent

and hands that are empty.

I approach You with no

argument in my mind

or words to offer in my defense.

I stand before You

naked and undeserving,

broken and weak.

I am quite aware of the

duplicity of my heart,

the evil of my choices,

and the failure of my behavior,

but I am not afraid

because I stand before You

with one argument,

with one plea.

This argument is enough.

This plea is sufficient.

This argument is the only thing

that could ever give me

courage,

rest,

and sturdy hope.

So I come before You

with this plea:

Your mercy.

Your mercy is my rest.

Your mercy is my hope.

Your mercy makes me bold.

Your mercy is all I need.

Your mercy

tells me You will hear.

Your mercy

tells me You will act.

Your mercy

tells me You will forgive.

Your mercy

tells me You will restore.

Your mercy

tells me You will strengthen.

Your mercy is my

welcome,

plea,

and rescue.

I rest in this one thing:

You are mercy

and

You will answer.

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Status Report, July

Sitting...at my dining room table. I was on the porch but it's like 200% humidity out there. Ugh.

Drinking...coffee, black, from my husband's LiveStrong mug in honor of The Tour.

Watching...The Tour. The Tour de France, that is, though I'm not watching right now exactly. We are a household of cyclists, my husband and two of my boys (maybe more to come), so The Tour is a greatly anticipated event each year. And with Lance's comeback? All the more exciting. And yes, I do watch with them and actually find it all pretty interesting--but that's fodder for another post.

Resuming...my hurried pace of driving kids all over town all day long. I enjoyed a brief respite last week while my oldest two were away at a youth conference but this week, it's back to the races. Literally.

Anticipating...vacation in a couple of weeks. We need it. All of us.

Hoping...to be able to meet up with Melissa of Breath of Life while we're on vacation in her neck of the woods. Won't that be fun?

Still looking...for some comfortable shoes to wear while on vacation. We will be walking. A lot. It seems that as the comfort level rises as does the shoe price so I want to be sure to make a wise investment. Any recommendations?

Planning...to attend the True Woman Conference in Chattanooga in the spring. Anyone else? I am so excited! Registration opens August 1.

Completed...Writing Places by William Zinsser and really enjoyed it. I've decided I love memoir. Reading memoir makes me want to grab a spiral notebook and a pen and sit under a tree somewhere and attempt to create something beautiful out of the dull, ordinary moments of my dull, ordinary life. As if. I don't, but I always want to, at least for a day or two. Anyway, speaking of Writing Places, we'll be giving a copy away next month at 5 Minutes for Books; watch for it!

Wanting...something really, really good to read. I have a stack of books waiting to be read (and, no, Jennifer, I'm not complaining) but I'm looking for something that is pure fun, a delight to read. What are some of your favorite pleasure reads? If you share your list with me, maybe I will post a list of my all time favorites.

Deciding...what to do when I get up from the computer. I need to (choose one or more of the following): Walk. Laundry. Chore lists for the boys. Clean house. Call the dentist. Go to the cleaners. Run kids all over town all day long. Yep, it's the glamorous life of a stay at home mom. Dull, ordinary, and not exactly the stuff of memoirs. No matter for in the midst of the dull and the ordinary (and the hopeless and the depraved) God has chosen to make known the greatness of the riches of His glory, Christ in me, the hope of glory! Him we proclaim!

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You asked; I'm answering--Part 5

I'm coming to you live from my back porch. Aren't laptops amazing? It is such a gorgeous morning--blue skies, sunshine, cool(er) temps, a breeze. Beautiful!

So we're back to the You ask; I'll answer (maybe) series of posts wherein you, the loyal reader (the few! the proud!) asked and now I'm attempting to answer.

(If you're interested, here is Part One, Part Two, Part Three, and Part Four)

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Among Elle's questions, What home improvement projects would you do if money were no object?

Let's see. A pool, definitely. A deck off my back porch complete with an outdoor fireplace. I should say refinishing the hardwood floors because they need it, badly. Does a maid count as a home improvement project?

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Elle also asks me to describe my dream vacation/home/weekend.

My dream vacation: I'd love to go to the Holy Land. The Grand Canyon. Or out to California. And to Venice. The English countryside. London. But not all at once. :-)

My dream home: One that cleans itself.

My dream weekend: Home, on the porch on a beautiful morning. I'm so boring.

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Liz wants to know about a theological concept that eludes me.

I seem to continually forget my own desperation and depravity before a holy God, pursue my own self sufficient form of self righteousness and thus minimize and despise His saving grace. Just the other day I was reading Elyse Fitzpatrick's Comforts from the Cross and I had to put the book down as the double edged sword pierced my heart (more like plunged into my heart) revealing my pursuit of my own glory. Though I immediately confessed and repented, my heart was broken. I saw how I had used ministry as a means of gaining glory for me, me, me. I am ashamed even now to admit it to you. How can I forget His grace? Oh, but I do. I keep forgetting that I cannot curry His favor nor gain His approval. I turn serving Him into standards to live by and rules to keep--though I can't do either. I am lost, desperate, and hopelessly sinful apart from His grace and mercy through His Son Jesus.

Side note--something that eludes me about parenting? The stupid inconsequential things children will find to argue over. I just had to get up and leave the beauty of the morning to mediate an argument over...wait for it...pillowcases. Yes, that's right. I washed my two youngest sons' sheets yesterday and though both sets of sheets are navy, purchased simultaneously, washed together, in other words, exactly the same, evidently (according to them) I mixed up the pillowcases. The argument? One brother wouldn't switch with the other because of purported slobber on said pillowcase. Just goes to show we are all depraved...

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Liz also asks what I love about math--is it algebra, geometry, calculus? Does it relate to any other areas of interest or outlook on life?

An easy question to answer. I love math because it is logical. There is a process and there is an answer. If x then y. It's reasonable. It's makes sense. How does this affect my outlook on life? I've spent a great deal of my life being frustrated that life doesn't make sense, that sometimes there is no answer, that I can't reason my way to a logical conclusion. And in parenting? Well, just because there is "x" doesn't guarantee "y" will follow. I'm just sayin'...

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So, there you go! Stay tuned for at least one more installment in the You ask; I'll answer (maybe) series of posts. Until then, may you enjoy a wonderful holiday weekend! I plan to be here on the porch, reading and guzzling coffee--at least until it gets too hot for either!

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Why I volunteer

Wednesdays are my days to volunteer at our local crisis pregnancy center, something I've been doing for several months now and something I truly love. We don't merely offer counseling to abortion minded pregnant women; our ministry extends far beyond that to help meet the needs of the woman herself, giving out maternity clothes and car seats for example. In fact, in my limited experience that has been the bulk of what we do. Far more women come in our doors seeking some kind of material aid, be it diapers or baby clothes. As opportunity arises, we make every effort to share the hope of Christ with every woman we can.

Like I said, I love it. I love meeting needs in some small way. I love seeing the babies. I love meeting the moms though sometimes their circumstances are hard to hear about. I love talking about Jesus, though I certainly stumble all over my words and never seem to express myself quite right. I love knowing that their only hope is my only hope as well: the grace and mercy offered at the cross. I also love serving alongside other women committed to bringing glory to Christ by serving women in difficult circumstances and by seeking to protect the unborn.

Our director of our local center asked me to write a short essay about why I volunteer to be included in our upcoming newsletter. I thought I'd share it here as well...

I volunteer at the Real Life Pregnancy Center for all the reasons you might guess. I believe in the sanctity of human life. I hate the evil of abortion. I believe that it is my duty as a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ to defend the defenseless. I believe that God is the Creator and Author of life, all life, and therefore life, all life, is to be honored and nurtured. It is my privilege as a counselor at RLPC to seek to promote the unborn’s right to life.

However, I do not volunteer for the baby’s sake only. I also seek to serve the Lord Jesus by serving the women who enter our door. As you know, many of our clients find themselves in difficult circumstances. It is my joy to give them a pack of diapers or some clothes, a cup of water in Jesus’ name as it were, and thus serve them by meeting a real material need. I am eager for the opportunity to share with them the hope found only in Christ, and each Wednesday I ask the Lord for both opportunity to declare the gospel and for boldness to be obedient.

And actually, that is the real reason I serve. I volunteer out of a desire to glorify God. He has called me to promote the sanctity of life and to serve our clients with respect and love as I hold out the word of life, the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. Being a part of the Lord’s work at Real Life Pregnancy Center is a privilege and a joy, and I am grateful that the Lord has granted me this opportunity.

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Comforts from the Cross

I have a new favorite author, Elyse Fitzpatrick. I recently finished two of her books: Comforts from the Cross and Idols of the Heart. Both books are unlike a lot of the offerings from current Christian authors in that her message to women is not about maximizing your potential, discovering yourself or living your dreams. Rather, Fitzpatrick consistently points to the cross as our only hope, our only joy, our only glory. In fact, more than once in my reading of either book I would have to pause and put the book down because my sense of conviction was so strong--which is good thing. Totally good. It is the Lord's kindness that draws us to repentance!

Comforts from the Cross is subtitled: Celebrating the Gospel One Day at a Time. And it does. A devotional comprised of thirty one meditations on the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ, Comforts from the Cross points women to the only true source of satisfaction and joy. From the publisher's description:

Daily comforts from the gospel of Christ provide busy Christian women with brief but deep reminders of how his truths powerfully connect to their daily lives.

Nothing comforts a woman’s soul more than a fully understood and embraced gospel. But many women aren’t finding solace in their relationship with Christ because they don’t see how his life, death, and resurrection connect with soccer practices and swim lessons. Besides, they just don’t have time to sit down and read a theology book, no matter how much they might hunger for God’s truths.

That’s where Elyse Fitzpatrick’s latest book comes in. Comforts from the Cross provides those well-intentioned women with bite-sized readings to remind them of their place in Christ and of his love and ministry in their busy lives. It also dusts off the facts of the gospel to show how ancient truths such as justification, sanctification, and redemption can free and enliven their souls every day. Even more, these five-minute celebrations of the gospel relieve readers of legalistic condemnation and empower them for joyful obedience by engendering fresh love for the Savior.

I've quoted excerpts here on my blog but perhaps the most convicting portion of the book (to me) is found in the chapter titled "Glory to God Alone." There Fitzpatrick writes:

The truth about our twisted hearts, whether we're comfortable admitting it, is that we want very much to have a little bit of the glory come to us. We want to be able to approve of ourselves, to look at our record and say, "What a good girl am I!" Then when we fail, when we let ourselves or others down, we hide from God, give in to despair and self indulgence or recommit to trying harder, over and over again in an endless cycle of self-righteousness, self-loathing, pride, and shame.

Hello, she's reading my mail.

We want Christ's glory for ourselves. Jesus Christ is willing to share his righteousness with you, to impute to your record his perfect obedience. But his glory he will not share with anyone. You will not receive praise in heaven; no one will glorify your name. No one will say to you, "This person is here because of you." The praise will all belong to him because he has accomplished it all. Our desire to take his glory for our own isn't merely futile; it's an attack against his perfect work.

Here's the good news...

We won't value or cherish him as we should until we openly and freely embrace our wretchedness and our utter inability to reform ourselves. Only then will we fall freely into his arms of grace and there joyfully exalt the salvation he has purchased with his blood. As we learn to despair of seeing any merit or power in our own goodness, we will see his merit and power for what it is: our only hope of salvation. This perspective, and only this perspective, will enable us to love him as he deserves to be loved.

Our utter inability to save ourselves or even to maintain our salvation once it's been granted to us brings great glory to the Son: it exalts his power, his purity, his grace, and his mercy.

Listen, I told you it was convicting. Or it is for me. But, remember, conviction is good because it points us to the cross as the only means for forgiveness and restoration!

Comforts from the Cross is full of God-glorifying gospel truth and relates that truth to the real lives of women: our insecurities, our desire for satisfaction, our yearning for meaning and purpose. I am thankful for the ministry of Elyse Fitzpatrick and I look forward to reading more of her books. In fact, I have Counsel from the Cross currently awaiting its turn in my To Be Read pile...

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#601

It's Tuesday and while I've started several posts in between it's been a week since I actually published anything. Of course, I'm not telling you anything you don't know but I myself wonder how a week can slip by without my realizing it.

If not blogging, then what did I do all week? In summary, I spent all of last week sweating. Literally. My oldest son played nine basketball games last week, all without air conditioning, a modern convenience I am now all the more grateful for.

We sweated over the weekend too, in Memphis for some bicycle races despite a heat advisory and 100 degree plus temps. My two oldest boys competed in a road race and a time trial on Saturday and then my oldest son raced in a criterium Sunday. They did well though the heat was some kind of brutal.

Look, I have pictures!

My two cyclists before the time trial Saturday evening:

My oldest in the criterium Sunday morning. The corners make me nervous!

My oldest sprinting to the finish but couldn't quite get there first.

Are y'all impressed or what?

And while I'm being all technologically advanced and posting pictures and stuff, Sandra tagged me for a photo meme. The rules are:

1) Go to your photo files… Select the 6th photo folder or album.

2) Select the 6th photo in that folder/album.

3) Post that photo along with the story behind it.
4) Then challenge some blog friends to do the same!

Here's my number four son, Christmas 2001. He was two and enamoured with all things Blue (Note the Thinking Chair). What a cutie!

If you feel like posting, consider yourself tagged!

In other news, this is my SIX HUNDRED AND FIRST blog post, if you could call it that.

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What's On Your Nightstand, June

Time once again for 5 Minutes for Books' monthly "What's On Your Nightstand?" carnival!

I am currently reading...

Idols of the Heart: Learning to Long for God Alone--A very convicting look at the deepest desires of our hearts and our temptation to look for satisfaction and meaning and purpose in "idols" and not in the Person of Jesus Christ.

The Texicans--Think Lonesome Dove.

A Shelter in the Time of Storm: Meditations on God and Trouble--Fifty one meditations on one of my favorite Psalms, the 27th.

The Disappearance of God: Dangerous Beliefs in the New Spiritual Openness

What are YOU reading? We want to know! Post your list and link up here, then go see what's on everyone else's nightstands!

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Monday Mini-Posts, a list of 4

A few things on my mind, posts that aren't quite posts, mini-posts if you will...

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1. My husband is so good to me. He spoils me R O T T E N!

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2. Well, the Long Overdue Painting of the Half Bath project is done. More or less. I still need to rehang the mirror. Since I'm on a project roll here (you know, one every 2 years or so...) I'm looking toward my next project? Painting the kitchen? Or, not nearly as fun but in dire need just the same, painting the trim? Staining the porch floor? The options, they are endless. The energy and motivation, not so much.

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3. The 2010 dates and locations for the True Woman Conference have been announced and registration begins August 1. I didn't go last year to Chicago but I listened to the audio messages--really good stuff! I really, really want to go to Chattanooga in March!

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4. I've been pondering this statement from Elyse Fitzpatrick's book, Idols of the Heart: Learning to Long for God Alone:

"your strongest desires, the things that you are most passionate about, are what ultimately define your worship."

So I've been asking myself--what do I want the most? Think about the most? Fear the most? Worry about the most? Dream about the most? In other words, what defines my worship?

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Spring Reading Thing, all wrapped up

Well, spring is over. No surprise there as it has been H-O-T outside! The end of spring marks not only heightened temperatures but also the conclusion of Katrina's reading challenge, Spring Reading Thing 2009.

You can see my original goals for the challenge here. So, to wrap it all up...

Books from my original Spring Reading Thing List that I completed (linked to my review where applicable):

So Brave, Young and Handsome: A Novel, Leif Enger
Don't Let Me Go, Pierce
Around the World in Eighty Days , Jules Verne
Austenland: A Novel, Hale
The Passion of Mary-Margaret, Lisa Samson
Dough: A Memoir, Mort Zachter
Certain Jeopardy, Struecker and Gansky
Sometimes a Light Surprises, Jamie Langston Turner--watch for an upcoming review at 5 Minutes for Books
Tell the Truth: The Whole Gospel to the Whole Person by Whole People, Metzger
Surrender: The Heart God Controls, Nancy Leigh Demoss
Real Moms...Real Jesus: Meet the Friend Who Understands, Savage
The Bookends of the Christian Life, Bridges and Bevington--watch for an upcoming review from me and Carrie both at 5 Minutes for Books
Get Outta My Face!, Horne
Spiritual Mothering: The Titus 2 Model for Women Mentoring Women, Hunt
Comforts from the Cross: Celebrating the Gospel One Day at a Time, Fitzpatrick--watch for an upcoming review!

Books from my original list that I did NOT read (only one!):

A Tale of Two Sons: The Inside Story of a Father, His Sons, and a Shocking Murder, MacArthur

Books not on my original list but I read anyway--also linked to my review where applicable:

(I think. I mean, I know I read them I just can't remember when, exactly, and if the reading fell in the Spring timeframe but I think so)

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Finding An Unseen God--watch for an upcoming review!

Face of Betrayal

The Count of Monte Cristo

The Help

How Do I Love Thee?

Clara's War

Saints in Limbo

The Great Gatsby

Every Secret Thing

The Hunger Games

Whew! That's a lot of reading! In conclusion, Katrina wants to know...

• Did I finish all the books on my list? Yes, all but one.

• Did I stick to the original plan or change things as I went along? Some of both. I stuck to the plan but, as you have no doubt noticed, I added just a few titles here and there (I think. I didn't pay too close attention to the dates I completed the books but I'm pretty close.)

• What was my favorite book? Hard to choose. For fiction, I loved (loved!) The Count of Monte Cristo as well as The Hunger Games, So Brave, Young and Handsome, and The Help. Of course, I love every minute spent with Harry Potter, even the second time around (or more, I'm not telling). My favorite non fiction read would be a toss up between Finding An Unseen God, Dough, Surrender, and Clara's War. Really, I loved all three, for different reasons.

• Did I discover a new author? Yes, I read several books by authors I hadn't read before but I am most excited about the next book by Suzanne Collins, author of The Hunger Games.

Thanks, Katrina, for hosting the reading challenge! If you're interested in seeing what everyone else read this spring, check out the official wrap up link up here.

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Teach me Your way, O Lord

Sunday night my pastor taught on understanding Old Testament prophecy, using Matthew 2:13-15, "Out of Egypt I have called my son," as a springboard. From Matthew, we flipped to Hosea, looked at verses in Genesis and Numbers, and returned back to Matthew.

It was some deep stuff. I think I can speak on behalf of the rest of my fellow church members when I say it blew our minds.

Why go there? Why struggle to understand the deep things of the Lord? Why seek to unravel mysteries that are hard to comprehend? Why do the difficult work of studying, thinking, and examining?

I've started reading Paul David Tripp's devotional A Shelter in the Time of Storm, a series of meditations drawn from Psalm 27. Contemplating verse 11, "Teach me your way, O Lord," Tripp gives two reasons that we should pray to be taught again and again and again by the Lord:

Depth. The wisdom of the Lord is deep and without boundaries. Giving ourselves to the study of His Word increases our worship as we realize the "depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God!" (Rom. 11:33)

Danger. As Tripp says,

Every day a thousand voices speak into my life and the vast majority of those voices have not gotten the flowers of their insight from the wisdom garden of the Lord.

They tell me who I am. They tell me what life is about. They tell me how to invest my time. They tell me how to use my resources. They tell me how to conduct my relationships. They tell me what is true and untrue. They tell me what my goals should be. They tell me what the good life looks like. They tell me what I should be and do and want. They offer me a comprehensive system of wisdom that's well thought through and attractive on many levels, but that competes with the true wisdom that can come only from God. It's so easy to be taken captive. It's so easy to have divine wisdom corrupted by human wisdom. It's so easy to breathe in the polluted air of a culture that no longer actually thinks that God is, let alone that he is wise.

So, why do the difficult work of plumbing the depths of the deep things of the Lord? Because fools despise wisdom and instruction (Prov. 1:7). Because His ways are higher than our ways (Is. 55:9) Because as we determine to seek Him, we will find Him. Because our (albeit limited) knowledge of things too hard for us to understand moves us to humble adoration of the only One wise. Because it is our joy as His beloved children to know Him in ever increasing intimacy.

And, because we are at war. Because the lies of our world are so pervasive and so attractive and our flesh is so weak and so given to deceit, we must seek the Truth. We must long for the wisdom of the Lord. We must have a humble, teachable heart that begs to be taught so that we may stand despite our enemy's schemes.

Determine to be a student of the Word of God. Marvel over the depth of the Lord's wisdom and arm yourself to face the danger of our world system. As you pray, "Teach me your way" you will find that is a prayer the Lord delights to answer.

My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you,
making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding;
yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding,
if you seek for it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,
then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God.
For the Lord gives wisdom;
from his mouth come knowledge and understanding...

Prov. 2:1-6

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